How to Get Through the First 24 Hours After a Breakup?

Okay, friend. Seeing this title, I know you must be feeling absolutely awful right now. It feels like your heart has been hollowed out and the world has turned grey. Don't be afraid; this feeling is normal. Almost everyone who's been through a breakup understands.

For the first 24 hours, our goal isn't to "get over it," to "figure it out," or even to "feel better." Our only goal is to "get through it." Just like the first day of a high fever, you just need to lie down, drink water, and endure.

Here are some practical suggestions to help you get through these toughest 24 hours.

First and Most Important: Allow Yourself to Fall Apart

You don't need to pretend to be strong. If you want to cry, cry your heart out. If you want to punch your pillow, punch it. If you want to wrap yourself in a blanket and zone out, do it. Emotions are like floodwaters; you can't block them. You need to give them an outlet.

Cry it out: Crying is your body's way of releasing stress and sadness – there's science behind it. Don't hold it in.
Find a safe space: Your bedroom, a quiet corner. Give yourself an undisturbed space to feel and release your pain.

Second, Create a "Physical Isolation Zone"

Right now, you need to protect yourself from anything that might trigger a fresh wave of pain.

Put your phone away, temporarily: This is the most crucial step. You might feel countless urges to check their social media, reread your old messages, or even call them. Don't do it. It will only hurt you repeatedly. Put your phone on airplane mode, or ask a friend to hold onto it for a few hours.
Out of sight, out of mind: Put away photos of the two of you on your desk, gifts they gave you – temporarily pack them into a box and stash it somewhere you can't see. You're not throwing away the memories, you just don't need them reminding you of the wound right now.

Seek Support, But Choose Wisely

You don't need to tough it out alone, but be smart about who you reach out to.

Find a "Listener," not an "Analyst": Call your most trusted, most patient friend. Tell them clearly: "I'm really hurting right now. You don't need to give me advice or analyze who was right or wrong. Just listen to me talk, or just be with me for a while."
Avoid the "Lecturers": For now, avoid friends who immediately say things like "I told you so..." or "There are plenty of fish in the sea." You already know these platitudes, and hearing them now will only make you feel worse.

Take Care of Your Body, Even Just the Basics

Your heart is exhausted; don't let your body break down too.

Drink water: Whether you feel like it or not, please remember to drink water – warm water is best. Crying dehydrates you, and dehydration will make you feel worse.
Eat something: I know you probably have no appetite. Don't force yourself to eat a big meal, but try to eat something simple and easy to digest. Like a bowl of warm congee, a slice of toast, a banana. Having something in your stomach gives you basic energy.
Take a hot shower: Hot water can help relax your tense muscles and nerves. In the shower, you can keep crying, or just zone out. Let the water wash away some of the exhaustion.
Try to sleep: You might have insomnia; that's normal. Don't force yourself to sleep. Try listening to some calming white noise, meditation music, or a boring audiobook. Even if you can't sleep, lying down with your eyes closed is still restful.

Do Some "Mindless" Tasks to Distract Yourself

Your brain is overloaded; it needs things that don't require thought to switch gears.

Watch a bad movie or a comedy you've seen a million times: The key is no thinking required, and absolutely NO romantic movies! Shows like My Own Swordsman (Wu Lin Wai Zhuan) or Friends are good choices.
Listen to a podcast or audiobook: Choose a topic you're interested in but that's light. Let someone else's voice fill your mind, temporarily crowding out the painful thoughts.
Simple chores: Like folding laundry, mopping the floor. This kind of repetitive, simple task with a clear start and end can have surprisingly therapeutic effects.

Things NOT to Do in These 24 Hours

Don't make any major decisions: Like quitting your job, moving, or cutting off all your hair (a trim is okay). Your judgment is clouded right now.
Don't contact them: This is non-negotiable. Don't send messages like "Can we talk?" or "I miss you." It will only cost you your last shred of dignity and likely cause more pain.
Don't numb yourself with alcohol or drugs: Getting wasted solves nothing. The hangover headache and the emptiness when you sober up will only double the pain.
Don't obsessively blame yourself or solely blame them: Now is not the time for a post-mortem. Who was right or wrong in the breakup is complex; save that for when you're emotionally stable. For now, stop replaying "If only I had..." in your head.

Finally, Remember This:

Right now, it feels like the sky is falling, but the world is still turning. These 24 hours will be incredibly, incredibly hard, but they will pass.

You are weathering a fierce storm. Your task isn't to build a house in the storm, but to hold on tight to whatever you can, hunker down, and take one step at a time until it passes.

Allow yourself to be fragile. Give yourself time. Sending you a virtual hug.